The Writing Moose

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The Rise of the Facebook Snob

So hear I am, at a local Starbucks, on my Mac as it is the law in Starbucks, and I’m supposed to be correcting papers, but I only want to tweet and post (I know, that sounds dirty). I always find it so amusing when I discuss Facebook with my non-Facebooking friends. They say “I’m not on Facebook or Twitter” with this inflated sense of pride as if they have accomplished something. As if they had the strength and fortitude to resist this social media siren unlike the rest of us weaklings. I can hear them saying it to me behind their snide grins - “I didn’t drink the Kool-Aid like the rest of you Facesheep.”

Has the dawn of the social media age spawned a new breed of snob? Are they better than us because they are not spending hours staring at scrolling posts? What do they do with all that free time? Are they writing poetry? Curing cancer? They are off the grid, under the radar of the social media and that’s the way they like it. Jesus God, these people probably still write letters! Real letters! Now in their defense, I too despise the blockheads who post things like “My cat really knows me” or “I just had a glass of wine.” I also do not need to see a picture of you new moms breastfeeding for the first time, thank you very much. That being said, it can be worth wading through the dribble to make a Facebook connection. Besides, where else can you get hundreds of simultaneous well wishes on your birthday?

So what do we say to those who would consider themselves above such frivolity, the would be cyber hermits? Facebook is not only the virtual coffee house of the Internet it may soon be the only way we communicate. So get off that horse and buggy, plug in and save the letters for grandma.